Saturday, January 7, 2017

has the whale sunk?

a dancer born without limbs
dreams of a masked man
it’s scaring
there’s no accounting for the freaks
but it’s scaring
the moments drag slowly
how fast are we going?
how did it come about?
and how about the bananas?
bless my fingernails!

a desert would be a relief
you've nothing to fry
have you?
your possessions will go
what are you gonna do?
have you anything?
they are like medieval illiterates
it might as well be rocket science
so far as the eyes are concerned
bless my sunday hat!

Saturday, October 29, 2016

finnegan's haiku 12 & 13

first thou shalt not smile
till the rending of the rocks
fix your eyes darkled

a handful of thumbs
stray on our long last journey
the angel of death

the pet monkey commits suicide

i found it bristling with ants.
it's awful dead.
my eyes were popping out of my head.
it is molecules and acids.
my main purpose is not to receive messages.
so let me up out of this.

i get my kicks above the waistline,
white refrigerators gleaming with ripolin
what properly riled them up was a bite from a sheep.
i have no special regard for satan
waiting for the snake to grow wings.

my chart shines high where the blue milk's upset.
i fear those big words
son, you forgot to give me back my keys.
you will not regret it, if you live.
the country needs skilled trade rats.
we'll talk about your moles later.

Sunday, October 23, 2016

finnegan's haiku 11 & 12

emmet and demmet
ptuh what a zeit for the goths
schneezed the gracehoper

you’ll die when you hear
your somatophage merman
duddurty devil

albania's hard to rhyme

in the house above the world.
somebody accidentally nudges their poodle.
behold the pre-prophetic symbols of the planes of never.
fleas love dogs, you know.
gentlemen, remember your etiquette.

cheese, toung, peanutbutter, spaghetti, pumpernickle on the bottom.
breast of flamingo.
i'll make a note of it!
you need an usher?
nearly everybody gets twitterpated in the springtime.

what's the latest on the psychological front?
horse trough, row boat! in a hotel?
she hasn't lost weight, but can she climb a tree.
i'll start handing out baseballs.
you owe me a cadillac.

Wednesday, October 19, 2016

finnegan's haiku 9 & 10

bozun braceth brythe
sangles angles and wangles
dearo dearo dear

and so they arted
siddle down and lissle all
kissing steadily

good people of moronika

he tried to swallow the bathtub.
so early in the morning.
wake up and go to sleep.
you're barking up the wrong fish.
here's some cyanide and razorblades.

when you hear the conk on the dome, it will be exactly 3 o'clock.
you're a sleep wrecker.
point to the right for this chump.
go to sleep before i murder you.
i'll tear your tonsils out.
you lamebrains can't do anything right.

oh, woe is moe.
oh, woe is you.
sometimes he goes too far.
he's the first one to admit it.
it is recognized that he has a funny sense of fun.

are you kidding me?
my mother knows my name.
i'm as pure as the driven snow.
i'm trying to think, but nothing happens.
i must be dead.
i hear an angel singing.

i caught this man walking down the street with a chicken.
hold hands, you love birds.

Monday, October 17, 2016

finnegan's haiku 7 & 8

the nachtingale jugs
traipsing through the tangle then
from quiqui quinet

rockabill booby
alohned in crowds to warnder
short of a frusker

(a cento on joyce's finnegan's wake)

Sunday, October 16, 2016

finnegan's haiku 5 & 6

vulgar ear cuddling
the old semetomyplace
moykle ahoykling!

to make his money
see that old buzzard whooping
fulled of potchtatos

(a cento on joyce's finnegan's wake)

sharp as a bowling ball

salt, pepper, or cyanide?
oh my poor mother.
that boy's as sharp as a bowling ball.
living over a cat food factory has its advantages.
but he'll never make it to the grotto.

i'm sorry you're stupid.
i don't know what it is with those sideburns.
do you have any idea what i'm talking about?
the waterfall was pretty weak.
now i gotta go find a trombone.

some of my best ancestors are chinese.
oh, you are just the cutest thing.
a salmon egg flew out of your mouth.
maybe she can bend down again and pick up your tongue.
nice girl but about as sharp as a sack of wet mice.

finnegan's haiku 3 & 4

sax hork pedwar pemp
stillness the heartbeats of sleep
voult of my palace

and pfor to pfinish
and pfor to pfinish our pfun
our pfun of a pfan

(a cento on joyce's finnegan's wake)

what’s all the kerfuffle about?

violent kerfuffle
cronut kerfuffle
velvet kerfuffle
pizzeria kerfuffle
giant kerfuffle
dickensian kerfuffle
baby shower kerfuffle
iphone bending kerfuffle
snuffle kerfuffle
reshuffle kerfuffle
truffle kerfuffle
kremlin kerfuffle
chicken kerfuffle
snickerdoodle kerfuffle

cancer theory kerfuffle
gm compensation kerfuffle
awful waffle kerfuffle
irreducibly simple kerfuffle
grammy awards kerfuffle
prom dress kerfuffle
best hairy kerfuffle
vendor prefix kerfuffle
facebook ethnography kerfuffle

n.c. state t-shirt kerfuffle
ascension animal shelter kerfuffle
silly george stephanopoulos kerfuffle
cate blanchett press kerfuffle
ben affleck's card-counting kerfuffle
great spiritual formation kerfuffle
netflix's kerfuffle in canada

kerfuffle over the chairmanship
kerfuffle over waffle maker
kerfuffle over global wealth stats

diablo ip theft trial kerfuffle
quincy korean war remembrance kerfuffle
la urbana sidewalk seating kerfuffle
red sox pitching coach kerfuffle
8gb xperia m4 aqua storage kerfuffle

kerfuffle follies
kerfuffle in spanish
kerfuffle before christmas
kerfuffle by the jetty
kerfuffle over finding a kiffle
kerfuffle over non-cosmological quasar redshifts

queen of kerfuffle

Saturday, October 15, 2016

finnegan's haiku 1 & 2

in their quartan agues
that song sang seaswans
handsboon and strumpers

i have not stopped water
by footblows coulinclouted
i sink i’d die down

(a cento on joyce's finnegan's wake)

ulysseish 14 - archangel, defend us

the ghost walks
thump thump thump
sternly across the sunbeam
in which he blurred
in silver heat silverpowdered
he seems to have shrunken
wanderers on the earth
lost in the wood
float bumped dullthudding
wander through the world
for the ruin of souls

(a cento on joyce's ulysses.)

Sunday, October 9, 2016

hieronimo's mad, bad and dangerous to know

i'm gonna save you.
then we will sing all the cowboy songs.
settle down sir, the doctor says.
you're just going to have to be a little patient.
he don't make monkeys, he just train 'em.
yet you still keep to this obstinate silence
will you send a dinghy, please?
you're barking up the wrong fish.
he has the ability to nullify all radar beams.
generated by a giant flying saucer.
he cut your head off and put it in his tv set
because he wanted to change into a dope.
it is something or is he an imbecile.
what do you tell a man with two black eyes?
nothing, he's already been told twice.
in waking life you have never even been to kentucky.
so go feed those hogs before they worry themselves into anemia.
and i'll bet my badge that we haven't seen the last of those weirdies.

Saturday, October 8, 2016

a mouse did run

it is wise to bring some water
when one goes out to look for water.
so please move your ass.
charlie don't surf.
dennis surfed.
brian couldn't surf.
it was a dark and stormy night.
as pretty as an airport.
twinkle, twinkle, little bat.
the minister needed it to stuff a cushion.
never trust a man with short legs.
i'll see your horse and raise you a grand piano.
around here we don't give a man a funeral
unless we're pretty sure he needs one.
we were all going direct to heaven.
we don't steal cable in heaven.
a mouse did run.
this story is done.

Friday, October 7, 2016

ulysseish 13 - the parallax of the subsolar ecliptic of aldebaran

him, the funniest man on earth
bronzed with infamy
staring out of death
over the calm sea
rested on the jagged granite
the words had left

(a cento on joyce's ulysses.)

the nice telephone company

i am from the nice telephone company.
i'm not your personal ballet.
i am a ridiculous person.
you want to know the way?
never fool with a fuzz ball.

how can a blind man be a lookout?
a cage went in search of a bird.
where are we, man?
just get out of my sun.
you raving oriental idiot.

are you bigger than the bad man?
don't break my jaw.
it is my guess that you will find it is english wax.
you take cereal, you take the milk, you pour it into the bowl.
i don't eat you anymore.

Sunday, October 2, 2016

ulysseish 12 - phthisis and hectic cheekbones

the swancomb of the gondola
the leg of the duck
take your crutch and walk
organtoned melodeon britannia
blurred cattle cropping in silver
venetian masts, maypoles
and festal arches
the exalted planetree,
the eugenic eucalyptus
trampling, cackling, roaring,
lowing, bleating, bellowing,
rumbling, grunting, champing, chewing
ominous revengeful zodiacal host
snouter and crawler, rodent
ruminant and pachyderm
in the penultimate antelucan hour
incarnated by the rubycoloured egos
from the second constellation

(a cento on joyce's ulysses.)

michael, we are not a codfish

the end is near.
disintegration is quite painless, i assure you.
i suppose you have some explanation for this boat being in your living room.
you do not own a cat.

nothing must disturb my undiluted englishry.
all i do is think and blink.
i'm multiplying, see? i'm multiplying.
poor little nimrod.

oh, george, you didn't jump into the river.
keep an eye skinned.
tattered gods slouching in their rags across the waste.
rosy cheeks, no warts.

being in love with a safe, they haven't got a name for that one.
are we still the good guys?
we're still the good guys.
why don't you shoot yourself an elephant?

so long, sammy! see you in miami!

Saturday, October 1, 2016

ulysseish 11 - how life begins

absence of light
the machines clanked
ignited a lucifer match
talking in the dusk
everything speaks in its own way
noisily with chattering
surface particles visiting in turn
saturation of air, distillation of dew
quenching thirst and fire

(a cento on joyce's ulysses.)

ulysseish 10 - hoopsa hoopsa boyaboy hoopsa

moving through the air high
in the ship last night
that was in his eyes
he was raving all night
i will not sleep here tonight
home also I cannot go

an infinite great fall of rain
coming here in the dark
they will walk on it tonight
coming here in the dark
that lay on the water like
the snout of a sleeping whale

proud lightning of the intellect
at the end of the second month
a human soul was infused
so dark is destiny

(a cento on joyce's ulysses.)

antipathy to wigs

with regard to purgatory, i will not say a great deal.
since my ancestors ate captain cook.
it's a tale of sorrow to freeze the lachrymal canals.
and it makes the very blood congeal.
why, it's worse than having a tooth pulled.
so we will now sing the ninetieth psalm.

i can manage the horse.
until another painter of horses is sent for.
but sheep are the stupidest creatures living.
what is your opinion of a tolerable egg?
i have two ducks and a turkey in my drum.
and have always been lenient with lobsters.

i will take a dollar for the car.
but then why should i keep my bed?
he left them dead.
and i say prithee be gone; for thy boots stink.
i prefer a higher type of humanity.

Saturday, September 24, 2016

ulysseish 9 - trumpery insanity trumpery insanity

our father who art not in heaven
hell blast ye
like the transpontine bison
thou spawn of a rebel
why hast thou done
this abomination before me

that antechamber of birth
that faroff time of the roses
send us bright one
sinned against the light
on the mild morning air
wrought by wind of seeds of brightness

behold the mansion
rare lamps with faint rainbow fins
raindew moisture, life essence
celestial, glistening

(a cento on joyce's ulysses.)

my name is for my friends

just the place for a snark.
what do i get?
a lot of yak from you.
the clocks strike thirteen.
the clouds hang low in the heavens.
smolten in our mist.
one of these days the sun's gonna come up.
and burn a hole clean through the planet.
some guy had a sign saying it was the end of the world.
when you get there you'll find yourself a cheery land.
the drugs begin to take hold.
ahh, smell those christmas trees.
they're altogether ooky.
that, my dear vance
is the understatement of the year.